I enjoyed reading your article even with absolutely no knowledge of drag race UK or instagram experience. I'm eager to see what you do with a rewrite.

I love your title. Yes, you can use a general tightening up. Bring your central point into the introduction more explicitly. Thinking of your audience is a good idea. What exactly are you trying to convey? Is it a cautionary tale for other potential fan commenters on insta? Or are you trying to explore trolling more in depth?

A little bit of organization will help.